Tag: shame

How a Man Discusses Sex in the Shadow of Sexism

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A man risks the accusation, sometimes correctly, of objectifying women when discussing either sexual joy or desire. Male shaming may occur even if the focus is in favor of women’s pleasure or well-being. I recall refusing to have sex with a woman in spite of my strong wish. I insisted on the use of condoms (we had just met at a concert) and when I stood my ground, this beautiful mid thirties female insisted that I hated women. I do not think sexism used unfairly as… Read More

What Do You Mean by Normal People

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The concept of normal people. If we have little or no interest in sex we may withhold that information from most people. If we have desires other than the customary, we probably tend to keep those private. These strategic  omissions allow others to fill in the blanks with common ideas. Remember many popular ideas we now reject i.e. a flat earth were thought normal. Let’s keep this in mind when considering the fuzzy concept of “normal” A belief that the majority of people fit in the… Read More

Marriage Industrial Complex

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No sexual freedom

Authorities insist that relaxed sexual freedom must be illegitimate. They build a fence around a birthright with shame. Then, through custom, they sell you a constrained pleasure in marriage (and commitment). The church and tradition have acted like a corporation controlling a resource when it comes to sex. The way a corporation sells a natural resource like water is to build a fence around the resource, then build the infrastructure, and to get you access, you pay them and they control the resource and cost…. Read More