Tag: pleasure

Go Beyond Jealousy

  By
Todd Vickers

I want to talk about identity as perhaps the most important and often overlooked part of going beyond jealousy. Let us ask “who” gets jealous. If we will look at our own self-concept, the questions around this destructive emotion change. Unfortunately, the inquiry may not come spontaneously, as jealousy arises, intense feeling and finding some relief from the anguish may seem the only problem. Most of us see many faults in self-centered possessiveness but that does not necessarily stop the distress. While seeking security by… Read More

Hobbled Hearts Part 2

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Sacrificing for an Imagined Good When we believe the “right” relationship will secure good circumstances, we assume we know today what this bond should look like in the future. When we attempt to make human interaction similar to ideas we reject other alternatives. We turn our lovers into just a means. Let’s be clear, I use others as means but they have a value beyond that as ends. A lovers happiness, serving no purpose for me, is better than unhappiness obligated to me. People seduced… Read More

Hobbled Hearts Part 1

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Don’t condemn body desires We are double-dealing with body pleasures if we speak of them in dreadful tones. We take risks with sex but the same is true of driving. Let us disapprove of recklessness, not varieties of joy rendered safe through intelligence. When sexual delights happen every day without injury, we should not blame sex for errors of judgment. If we condemn physical desires, confusion results, especially when we commonly indulge these joys. This inconsistency can be set right, at least in part, by… Read More

Marriage Industrial Complex

  By
No sexual freedom

Authority insisted that relaxed sexual freedom must be illegitimate. They built a fence around a birthright with shame. Then through the custom, they sell you a constrained pleasure. We appease the uncomfortable sexual limits of tradition through buying things commercially associated with sex. The consumer receives an illusion of security and faux potency with each purchase. Why not embrace sexual freedom? Prostitution, infidelity and porn are the counter weight to this contortion of instinct called custom.  Free, kind, generous, and inclusive sexuality gets perverted by convention… Read More