How to compare loving non-monogamy versus codependent monogamy

loving non-monogamyloving non-monogamyThe desire to know and share what’s true, to share what’s best in life, to love wholly without restraint, to live intensely! These values did not arise … Read More

Bullshit hypnotic manipulation imposes sexual beliefs

hypnotic manipulationhypnotic manipulationMonogamy is a possessive ideology. It presumes to predict the future and often fails. Monogamy becomes a prison for affections and often kills the love that … Read More

Changing our views of love

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Love like water.

Instead of saying we have different kinds of love, such as, one kind for friends, another for family, and another … Read More

Don’t miss love

Don't miss loveDon't miss love

At the age of nine, the death of my beloved sister before she turned twenty taught me something about relationships and this lesson … Read More

Sexual Kindness

curvy_shycurvy_shyBy Todd Vickers

We will probably face fear or prejudice, including our own, when we dare to cross the frontiers of personal and social bias to explore sexual kindness. We … Read More

Reform socially NOT politically

politics-sexpolitics-sexBy Todd Vickers

Politics and sex can exist apart but those interested in sex should heed the 2016 election results. Since we shouldn’t rely … Read More

A monogamous irony

one-on-oneone-on-oneWould you like to see some different views that challenge beliefs about sex? We’ve got articles, videos, slide shows and memes you can peruse, contemplate, share and comment about. Consider a four part series … Read More

Go beyond cheating

Cheating ImageThis brief video looks at one of the mistaken value judgments hidden in the deceit of cheating.

A lie debases our longing for more joy and pollutes our morality. When we habitually use affections, including sexuality as a means, we forget those affections are something that makes life worth living, simply by themselves. This includes sexual affection for more than one other.

Let’s welcome sexuality in honesty.

Affections for their own sake is one of the things that make life worthwhile. Let’s not pretend sexual affection is unimportant when it is.

Non-monogamy, a growing morality

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The impulse to a more relaxed and open sexuality is not merely instinctive, but also moral. We see this (re)emerging morality* in conflict with … Read More

Facing facts, sex and climate change

Frog Viv adaptFrog Viv adaptWhat do sex and climate change have in common? Both involve facts we sometimes feel tempted to ignore or alter them to suit our existing ideas.

Here is an excerpt … Read More

Monogamy is not virtue

Not VirtueNot VirtueBefore considering sexuality let’s remember, if we have a prejudice, we might feel uncomfortable seeing others going beyond the limits of such beliefs. Being uncomfortable is not the same thing as being … Read More

How you love is up to you

The question is not what form the love takes but THAT we love consciously.

Love is not a routine and cannot be reduced to a preconceived idea without killing it.

ProhibitionProhibitionRead More

Non Monogamous Instinct

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A little slide show examining common views about non-monogamy. The sexual revolution has yet to begin.

 

 

 

 

Non Monogamous Instinct from NoShameInSex.Com Read More

Poly Follies | The Exhibit and Talk

20150404_182101-120150404_182101-1The talk “Polyamory Without Pathos” at Saguaro Man went well. Such a deep subject is impossible to delve into properly in just an hour. Below, I will broach several points mentioned during … Read More

Saguaro Man | The Poly Follies Art

Chita n GreggChita n GreggWe’re off to Saguaro Man tomorrow. Seven pieces of Todd’s art will be on exhibit called Poly Follies at Center Camp. He will be doing a talk Saturday at Noon called Polyamory … Read More

Challenging Relationship Myths

Come HereCome HereIf you take the prediction and control out of commitment, what is left?

Moreover, every disappointed commitment is built on a set of justifications that failed. Before you buy another bag of magic beans, why not … Read More

Our Sexual Value Judgments

Yang_Guifei_Mounting_a_HorseYang_Guifei_Mounting_a_HorseThe way we learn to judge our sex partners is questionable. We see our bias whenever ideal partnerships break up in spite of what seems the best of circumstances. Often we mistake means for ends. In American culture, we typically … Read More

Sexual Idealism

sexual idealismsexual idealismConcening sexual idealism, I discuss with my beloved Sharon various topics, including sex, the morning news and our plans for the day. One day our conversation turned to the free love of the 1960s. A postmortem on … Read More